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ahhhh dumb?

[ website | pik-sures ]
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(2 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

missing you [01 Feb 2006|08:53pm]
sometimes I think that losing friends calls for suicide, only to join them in spirit though... not really to get away. ya know?

(6 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

paranoid perplexity [27 Dec 2005|01:51pm]
one september two thousand five

Perplexing patterns of intertwining colors…
floating through this mazework utopia.
Adventuring through this infinite knowledge.
The wings get clipped
and now I’m falling.
Falling, falling, falling.
My spirit falls back to me from its astral projection.
Mind and spirit one again
And I arise from my slumber
to find myself enclosed
By this ever-darkening prison of loneliness.
Breathe, man. Breathe.
Everything will resolve and be okay.
When you put yourself on a silver platter,
People pick at you until there’s nothing left
But blood and bones.
Oh god! The room is spinning and breathing again.
This self-conscious alienation from others kills.
I think I’ll step outside for some fresh air.
Yeah, fresh air.
That will help, fresh air.
Walking out of this dilapidated, rotting house,
I see illuminated orbs dotting the runway.
The midnight sky is tainted with grey and blue,
Incessant factories insisting
On poisoning the one thing eternal in my life.
I see a streak of light scream across the sky.
Everything will resolve and be okay.
Right?
Was this reality of mine meant to be like this?
To have people take my offerings
Then walk all over me,
Trample me into the shaggy carpet?
They don’t think twice,
Why should I?
Thoughtfulness shouldn’t be an acceptable grimace.
Maybe if everyone average
Didn’t have their “original” thoughts and ideas
Fed to them from a glowing box,
People would think twice.
Wouldn’t that be nice?
Jesus, I’m freezing!
What am I doing standing naked here?
It’s the middle of December.
How embarrassing, back inside.
Hopefully those walls have calmed themselves.
Upon entry I see vibes going every which way.
The neon blues, greens, and oranges
Lead to the telephone.
Blasted telephone vibrations always getting the best of me.
I answer, its her.
The room quits spinning
The walls quit breathing
The vibes quit vibing.
“I’ll be there soon.”
It all starts back up again.
Spinning, breathing, vibing.
They speed up to make up for time lost.
This is complete insanity.
The door opens and it all subsides.
There’s an angel dressed in black
Standing in my doorway.
I’ve been blessed,
Saved from the ever-progressing hell.
“Everything will resolve and be okay, right?”
The angel answers.
“Only if you let it.”
Comfort is given in the oddest of ways,
Sometimes.
Her soft velvet face of snowy white complexion,
Brushes against mine.
And I feel as if all the paining, torturous thoughts are lifted.
I feel her silken black locks between my fingers
And I feel as if I have been carried to the heavens.
Panic attacks!
Is this my imagination?
Is this being of perfection really at my side?
Will I wake up tomorrow
Alone and bothered again?
I feel her pillow-soft hands touch mine,
The bliss returns.
I am caressed by this angel dressed in black,
Until my slumber presides.
Slowly I lose contact with this world,
And journey into another.
My mind is set free
And there is no evidence
Of any of those paranoid, problematic thoughts present.
If only I could carry one reality’s mindset
back over to the next world.

(12 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

[25 Jun 2005|02:12am]
i break it down again for love
i sing the songs you've been dreamin of
and maybe now youll hear what im sayin
up all night while your keepin me waitin'


ummmmm man i dont even fucking know
that acidic wine burns the mind
fuckin BAM

(3 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

regoofination is a key essential in the building blocks of a healthy lifestyle. [19 Feb 2005|11:28am]
sup eljay kids...

here's the rundown:

I live wif my momma and go to school at phoenix now
I hang out wif my buddies sean sam and courtney 'bout everyyday, true playa way.
My birfday is comin' up, that big 1-7.
that friday before spring break, april first
Joint birthday party with me and the gravlin at her place.
What better of a way to kick off such a great holiday, eh?

this niggaz goofin',
im outtt
byeuh-bye

(3 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

bonus nachos [07 Nov 2004|09:13pm]
[ mood | ariba ariba!!! ]

¡me gusta ir al la cervesa fiesta en el otono por estoy loco en la cabasa!

(16 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

[16 Oct 2004|11:04am]
[ mood | apathetic ]

I wish these dreams would just leave me alone.
Leave me to sleep and wake up without a guilty concience and full of regret.

Until then I'll just stick to my cloudy skies I know so well.

(11 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

deathcabsucks [12 Oct 2004|07:22pm]
So tonight I was sposed to see deathcab but shit sold out.
So now shit sucks.
Fuck putting so much into something and having nothing to show for it.
Fuck caring so much it fucking hurts and then getting hurt yet again to have a scar heal over what was there before.

Fuck all that shit...
uhhhhhh... yeah, I'll just leave it at that, fuck all that shit.


At least I fucking tried.

(8 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

misplaced memories [09 Jul 2004|01:19am]
[ mood | happy ]





hahaha, 4th period was the fucking SHIZNIT!

So I'm finally moving out to my mom's house. Things are going to be great, I'm so fucking happy. I move like the 21st or something like that, so I'ma be makin' up for some lost time before school starts if ya know what I mean. It's going to be so great going to collins hill again, but I am going to miss some aspects of the ridge. Mainly Chris Basha, Bryant Lawrence, Jessica Cardin, Camryn Park, and most of all... Coach fucking Laird. I dont know what I'm getting at, but I'm gonna miss them.

Work is going well, for all who do not know... I'm working at waffle house. Yeah..
It's a great job, I mean I make a fuckload of money and all... it's just that it sucks having to say, "uh yeah, I work at waffle house..." but at least I can say I got the most teeth in this entire fucking joint.


I want to go camping before I go back to school, someone make it happen.

there's so much else I could add, but I'm not because people dont like to bother with it all. So fuck yall'z im keepin this shit realz for real.


damn it feels good to be a gangsta,
-.adam sunshine.-

(puff, puff, pass)

[28 Jun 2004|09:37pm]
[ mood | fuuucked up ]


When you're left with only a bullet
I'll bring the trigger and a promise to pull it
I'll be the end of everyone who's ever entered your life
And taken pieces out of it.
I'll give you enough time to regain your composure
To reconstruct a heart that's torn apart from over-exposure
I know forever isn't long enough to forget the faces and places
...that played out your tragedy.

Our memory defeats us all
I�ve touched the stagnant water and muddy walls
Of the trench where you've been sleeping
And there's nothing there worth keeping
There's nothing there worth keeping
Or believe

So on the eve of the attack
we�ll Finger traced the targets on their backs
And open fire
Just hold on until they�re gone.
So with this kiss I promise to
Never forget what you did for me
You did for me...
I felt the sun on my face for the first time, and tasted blood on my tongue for the last.

When you're left with only a bullet
I'll bring the trigger and a promise to pull it
I'll be the end of everyone who's ever entered your life
And taken pieces out of it.
I'll give you enough time to regain your composure
To reconstruct a heart that's torn apart from over-exposure
I know forever isn't long enough to forget the faces and places
...that played out your tragedy.

(4 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

survery says... [20 Jun 2004|12:11am]
I AM: Ah-dumb Sunshine
I WANT: freedom
I HAVE: amazing friends
I WISH: things would always work themselves out
I HATE: drama
I MISS: the trust and freedom i used to have
I FEAR: fucking up
I HEAR: the talking heads
I SEARCH: for sucess
I WONDER: around the woods when im drunk
I REGRET: no regrets, you learn from every mistake
I LOVE: momma nature
I ACHE: what the fuck question is this?
I AM NOT: a bad person
I DANCE: when theres ants in my pants
I SING: when i'm happy
I CRY: when puppies die.
I WRITE: good essays about marijuana legalization
I WIN: water fights
I LOSE: lighters
I CONFUSE: names
I NEED: a friend by my side all the time
I SHOULD: go to sleep
x. three things you are often complimented for: being a good kid, my personality, my good service.
xyou get embarrassed when: I rarely am embarrassed
x. makes you happy: dogs
x. upsets you: lonliness/sadness
x. you keep a diary: What the fuck is this?
x.you like to cook: everything
x. you set your watch a few minutes ahead: kinda shits that?
x. you believe in love: friends and family yes; partners maybe but infatuation yes

Who is...?
The prettiest girl you know: toss up; but the sake of an answer.... my mom.
The weirdest person you know: my brother or alex chapman
The Loudest Person you Know: niggers dont count so maybe alex kreiger?
The Sexiest Person you Know: idunoooo
Your close friends: sean tighe, alex chapman, shamantha all-bittin', jes-sukkah cardin, lisa highfil, konya taytoe, lindssay batton, alex kreiger
The Person that Knows the Most about you:prolly sean tigh
Most Boring Teacher: fucking mrs. snellgrooooove

In the last 24 hours have you:

CRIED? no
HELPED SOMEONE? yess, getting coffee for people at work and holding the door!
BOUGHT SOMETHING? cigaretts
GOTTEN SICK? no
GONE TO THE MOVIES? no.
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? no
SAID "I LOVE YOU"? no.
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER? no
TALKED TO AN EX? no
MISSED AN EX? a little
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? What the fuck is this?
HAD A SERIOUS TALK? not really serious, but a good talk around a campfire


shits whack.

(4 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

Stick Some Needles In Yer Face [09 Jun 2004|11:05am]
[ mood | happy ]

Summer


Summer


Summer





So far so good... I've mostly been working, playing Halo, and bein with jes-suckah. Yeah, I got a job at Waffle House. I work at the one on riverside parkway, you'z guy'z should come by and visit me sometime.

My brother Eron is going to Europe today. I keep telling him he's gonna get really fucked up and end up fucking some swedish slut but he doesn't believe me.

Last night I got to thinking and I realized that I had so much fucking fun freshman year. Then I realized how little I see all of my friends and it made me sad...
So I guess what I'm trying to say is I need to start staying in touch with you guys and hangin' out with you guys more.

That is all.

P.S. The new Harry Potter movie sucks big ol' wizard dick.

(11 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

My Very Vantastic Trip Through the Amazon [05 May 2004|01:56pm]
[ mood | chipper ]


So last week in fourth period me and some buddies (Chris Basha and Bryant Lawrence) went on an adventure through the Amazon Rain Forest! On our adventure we saw many exciting creatures. When we first arrived, I spotted a very angry looking elephant!





It tried to attack us and take our precious novelty rainforest sunglasses, so we killed its ass!
Later, Bryant was taking a piss when he noticed a snake in the grass trying to strike at the other opposing "spitting" snake.





Later that night Bryant decided to go skinny dipping because they are faggots.
There was a massive hippo, but they went swimming anyways.





They soon realized the hippo was the least of their worries when Chris' leg was taken off by a crazed pahrana.





Later on, we all got shit thrown on us by a monkey. We arrowed his bastard ass soon after.





After getting shit thrown on us we saw Tucan Sam!!!





Good ol' Sam gave us some of his special jungle mix fruit loops, they were grrreat!

Even after killing that innocent shit-throwing monkey, Bryant's thirst for blood was not satisfied. He later went on to spear an endangered duck bill platipus, what a shithead.






And here's a pepper:







That sums up our amazing trip through the amazon. All in all it was fun, but I got sick and tired of Bryant and Chris always assfucking. Jesus Christ you guys, just get a fucking room!

(3 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

[19 Apr 2004|02:02pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

poo poo on your chest is shitty.

(4 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

flowers like you dont grow in florida [19 Apr 2004|12:51pm]
wo woo wo.
crazy over active great feeling day.

I'm glad Bart Simpson got to play some type of roll


I love my girlfriend jessica very very very much, she's what keeps me going everyday.
waking up.
staying clean.
making me smile.
making me laugh.
givin' me someone to make laugh.

jessica, ah-dumb sunshine <3luuuuuuuuvs<3 you.


burrrrrp oscar the grouch needs banana peels or he'll be grouchy!!!!

(25 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

mm mm eat it up [14 Apr 2004|04:58pm]
[ mood | high ]

whoops, supposed to be on a community... but i guess a nice picture like this never hurt anyone to view!

(11 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

I start feeling really ghetto... but then I remember how white I actually am [28 Mar 2004|12:27am]
[ mood | optimistic ]

Man, so my break has been pretty crazy.
Kind of outta control, but thats how things usually are.
I definitely wouldn't have it any other way... well maybe a few other ways.

Christmas was good. I got my brother back, that's probably the highlight.
Either that or this badass mp3 player I got. The thing never leaves my side.
When it does though, I go through withdrawls. First teacher that touches that shit is going to meet with certain death. samurai style.

say whaaaat?! you're crazy.

I met a girl that's really sweet, I want to get closer to her.
Thing's will work out if they're supposed to.
that's how things happen, im not questioning it.

oh yeah i think they're supposed to work out this time, 'cus it seems like they haven't alot more then they have.

muh buddy Dan Osbourne is over, we haven't hung out in ages.
its kind of a shame, actually it is a shame.


ohhh pendergrass tomorrow i hope
p.s. ajoining isnt a word!

(38 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

I'm stuck in mario world [01 Mar 2004|01:40pm]
[ mood | bored ]

Whastup jiiivejernal

I haven't been on this crap in a while since I lost my computer. It's better this way though cus I realized the internet still sucks... its just great means for free music. I think people think I died or fell off the face of the earth of something cus I never see anyone anymore. It really truely does suck, especially since the only fuckers I get to see go to my school and they're all well... fuckers.

My birthday's coming up, April 1st. I'm gonna be 16 and am gonna be expectin' some happy birthdays at least. My birthday usually sucks, I hope this ones different. HOooopefully I won't still be grounded, shit yeah.

motherfucker rawk

(23 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

fallin' in love was the best idea i ever had [27 Jan 2004|01:26pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

whadup yall?

I've been grounded lately, not for anything too big though and its almost up, so its all good.
Shit dude, now that I get writing on this god damn thing I have nothing at all to say. I think I'm gonna quit writing in this shit all together, the only thing I like it for is the potheads community.

I cant wait till it gets warm and the only thing I want to do is be outside with my friends. mmmm....
Random thoughts:
-warped tour is gonna be so much fucking fun
-co&ca show is comin up and its gonna be even that much more fun
-i want a cigarette
-i want a blunt even more
-my lovely girlfriend
-bryant just walked in at the very end of 4th prd, definitely up to fun.

(2 choaked | puff, puff, pass)

[10 Dec 2003|12:28pm]
I should have known you were no angel by the way you said my name.
I'm running.

(puff, puff, pass)

my heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel [02 Dec 2003|09:24pm]
[ mood | jubilant ]

mothaFUCK dumb bitches. word.

Thanksgiving break was great apart from fucking wrestling practice and tournaments, what the hell is that bullshit? It's cool though, I'm gettin pretty fuckin buff.
I'd have to say the highlights were gettin' high ass lit, empty houses rock that shit. On the same page, I got a new piece of glass... It's kinda thin, but I still love it none the less. Shitfuck i forgot to name it!!!
..that's definitely on my to-do list.
oh oh, I got a haircut too. It looks pretty good, I like it alot more then it long because I can be really lazy and not have to shower, yessss!
I also got a bunch of new clothes over break, I've been lookin' sharp allll week.

Today I went on a field trip to CNN center, it was pretty cool.
It consisted of going on a thrity minute tour, followed by 2 and a half hours of unsupervised exploring of atlanta.
The exploring consisted of food-crazed pidgeons, homeless people that need money, and camel lights.
All in all, I'd say it was the best field trip I've ever been on.

I just got done watching true life, or real life or whatever the hell its called. The one with that hotass skank Paris Hilton.
It did alot for me, but besides the obvious, it backed my theory most all rich kids are complete and total morons.
Look at your friends that have really rich families, chances are they're braindead.
Hmmm, I think I could make that into some type of thesis for college or something... I'll remember that.

All else is well, cept my bronchitus is coming back.. but that's no shocker.
I think I'ma take a break on smoking for a while.
like maybe a month just to get my system nice and clean... hmm... make that maybe like a few weeks.
but anyways, I'm sure it will have its perks.... you know what I'm talkin bout ;)


okay thats it... fuckin' bye

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